Played piano for so long

Many people played the piano for a considerable amount of time. Many of us knew of music and instruments for the longest time ever. Many of us heard of famous pieces for years! Some of us could have an instrument sitting in our house for centuries!

Yet, do I call myself a musician? Do I seriously feel music from the bottom of my heart, did I give service to music?

I don't think I did. I was frivolous and all I cared about was anything other than music. I am deeply ashamed.

Looking at Fur Elise for so many years, I didn't even knew that the actual Fur Elise is in Rondo form? Because I only played the first page. Choosing to only listen to mainstream pop songs and Disney, I was completely detached from the true classical world, I don't know of any famous composers other than Mozart and Beethoven, ok probably I knew of Chopin but I couldn't even pronounce his name right, and is he from Poland? Er, actually, where is Poland? Is it like Iceland?

I really wish I could remember anything, just anything from my Geography or History lessons, so that I can link them to music. Apparently, I was asked what Beethoven did concurrently when he wrote Sonatas... like seriously, no stupid answers like also writing other Sonatas, but like...what happened to Germany, is it under war, which propels Beethoven to compose an emotional Sonata? Or is he turning deaf, which explains why his last few Sonatas are different, and how different etc? I don't think I could ever give a satisfactory answer, without Google's help, because music history is not in my fingertips.

I still believe that singing and playing the piano well are more important than music theory and history, because music has to be alive and played! Not read and talked. But I also wish I can be more knowledgeable (is this the right spelling for knowledgeable because blogger doesn't have autocorrect) as a teacher, rather than always being cute friends with my students.

Maybe in my next life, I will be a professor. See you then!