And it shall be June 2026 in a few hours. Kinda still feeling overstimulated in this modern AI world as usual, but I could really feel my confidence & steadiness flowing into my body. The first few months of every Lunar New Year, especially this Horsie year, feels panicky & way too quick for me. However, I always feel that my emotions begin to settle into myself when June arrives. Maybe it's because I used to have so many friends with birthdays in June? Or maybe as a Buddhist, I can finally collect my thoughts after Vesak Day? HAHAHAHAHAH I AM SO LAME.

Looking forward, I have a longgg way to go. At least 2 cases that may include POLICE & LAW F.M.L. Before Vesak Day, I was major panicking. My stupid Barbie brain may never grasp anything to do with LAW but with the help of some Aunties HAHAHAHAHAHA, I feel.... can la can la.

A few things I just can't let go. I JUST CAN'T. The Buddhism in me needs to be activated. My own angst is killing myself. But life is so weird, I know I can let go. But...I don't know if letting go is the right choice. Sometimes, being a crazy stubborn freak seems okay to me.

GUYS I AM STILL FEELING VERY WEIRD LIVING IN A CONDO! I want my HDB flat back..... On a brighter side, I lowkey suspect Condos have cleaner water, probably because of the weekly wash of swimming pools? My acne slowly cleared & my skin, despite some darkening due to the sun, looks very beautiful. I.think.I.love.condos.

Yesterday, I was just revising my FRSM pieces and OOPS I completely forgot how brilliant I was in my mid-end 20s. I had this fiery technique for my Beethoven piece but I never learnt refinement until...just weeks before my FR exam. I am really glad my M forced me to do FRSM because that is my strongest memory in my life. You can take anything away from me LET ME KEEP MY FUCKING FRSM CERTIFICATE I exchanged my LIFE for that piece of paper. YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT ABOUT FRSM!!!

Sighs - off to dance to some pop music now....I need all genres of music for myself.

A very overstimulated week...

Life has just been disgusting & sickening... I filed a police report due to Theft of Cash in my own condo & I am lowkey getting ick vibes eww... I swear I am going to stomp into HQ to report my immediate manager this coming week but I am prioritising my facials & massages because I truly want to maintain my beautiful face & body until the day I die.

Nothing much to update - just discovered that I have zero woman hormones in me. Literally, zero. God forbid I don't feel the motherly instinct for kids & I suspect I've never loved kids. Probably I was always an adult trapped in the body of a kid while I was young? Never took a interest in anything childish. Yet, I love to drink, party & have fun!

Politically, I am following Xi JP & Donald Trump's meetup in Beijing! I am the perfect example of a person born in China, raised at home with traditional China values, educated in school with a mix of Asian/British knowledge & partied to all of USA's songs! If I ever get to leave Singapore, I would want to stay in a small town in USA? Don't wanna die though....

I feel like some traitor when I say I kinda like Donald Trump? He has this Big Daddy kind of vibes & I DIED HHAHAHAHAHA shaking with laughter every time T makes a media appearance or speech HAHAHAHAHA he made my day!!

Missing my old-time friends...but no la, not going to catch up liao. Gonna grow up, move on & look forward.

The First Art Exhibition of the Art Talent Society (Singapore) & Yiqing Fine Art

10 Penang Road, #01-02

Dhoby Ghaut Green

Singapore 238469

Nearest MRT: Dhoby G

The Art Exhibition was spacious, beautiful & a lovely walk for audience of all ages. I was so inspired I kinda want to pursue Art? Probably won't even need to spend money I'm just gonna use M's old materials HAHAHAHA!

Always felt that Art is an excellent choice because it keeps giving as we age, similar to Piano. Piano is  probably the audio version of Art? But Art just feels more...visual & easier to compare. When you put a few Art pieces side by side, you immediately know who is a better Artist, who is just a kid genius with limited vision, & who is truly a rich ass. Because the rich ass may probably have better foundation due to unlimited time & resources.

In another dimension, I am probably rich, famous, artistic & very very very fucking talented. As for right now... I'm back to my very very very boring & hopeless AF teaching career yawns....